Or…world of Presbyterians, or world of Reformed Christians, or just Christians, or — even better — world of people of faith who hope for (and expect) things to get better.

That’s a bunch of folks, I think. And since you’re reading this, let me introduce myself in hopes that you’ll stick with me, at least for a little while.

I’m a 70-year-old Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.) minister (“teaching elder” — what an awful term), recently retired after 45 years of doing it professionally. In that time I’ve had a bunch of experience, some it interesting stuff, some of it boring, and a hell of an education. I guess I’d like to share some of what I’ve noticed. Some you might agree with me; a lot you won’t probably. But I’d like to talk and see what happens.

So here we go.

Let’s start with same-sex marriage, a topic with which the PC(USA) has itself and its underwear in knots, as demonstrated by the inability of the PC(USA) General Assembly last month to redefine marriage in its book of rules (the Book of Order) from something that happens between “one man and one woman” to a contract between “two people” (regardless of gender, notice) that is so important that the state, which we Presbyterians affirm as being a gift of God and as good, gets involved by certifying the relationship as good and that it must last or there will be consequences to the parties.

Which seems to me where we Presbyterians and all us Protestants, for that matter, have gotten confused…or maybe just forgetful. We’re confused or have forgotten just who it is that does marriage.

It’s the state, God’s gift for ordering humankind and compensating for humankind’s invariably fallen nture, and not the church that does marriage. We clergy are functioning as agents of the state when we perform weddings and sign marriage licences. We Protestant clergy ought not to sacramentalize or romanticize what we do because what we are officiating over isn’t sacred or sacramental. We ought not to pretend that it is. (Agreed, for Roman Catholic clergy, marriage is a whole nuther matter. For them it is a sacrament.)

Nevertheless, marriage is important. It’s purpose is to protect weaker parties in family relationships and those who are dependent on those relationships from abuse by the stronger — or crazier — parties. And which marriage doesn’t have one party that isn’t stronger or a little crazier? Remember, as Reformed Christians, we all affirm our fallen nature and that we all fall short of the glory.

So marriage works…because, by law, it compensates for our shortcomings. If you abuse, you go to jail, regardless of the gender or age of the one you abuse. If you break the covenants of the legal family contract of marriage, you pay alimony or child support or both…big time sometimes. It’s how it works and should.

The kind of contract that marriage is, is good. It’s for the well-being of humankind. But it has nothing at all to do with gender. It simply recognizes the tendency of all of us…all of us, straight, gay, or otherwise…to sin. And it seeks to take care of that tendency. Thank you, Calvin.

And thank you for listening

— Bernie Nord

11 thoughts on “Hello, World.”

  1. The Reformed affirmation that marriage is NOT a sacrament is a critical element in the same-sex marriage debate. Thanks for raising it here. Ordination is also NOT a sacrament in our tradition, yet those who favored excluding LGBT folks from ordination completely ignored this key point on that issue as they are doing now on the marriage issue.

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    1. Thanks, Ken. Of course the ordination issue is similar. I had forgotten that. Why in the world do we have to sacramentalize/romanticize everything? Maybe being rational/thoughtful/logical (all “Presbyterian” values, I thought) is just too damned much work for people.

      BTW, do you have have a blog? You should. You’re a great writer, as I remember, always with something important to say.

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  2. Hey Dad, I thought all marriages were “Same-Sex”? Once two people are married, they have the Same Sex for the rest of there lives! (I couldn’t resist)

    Come to think of it. That might be one the reasons I don’t seem to have a good track record with marriage, it usually turns from same-sex to just no-sex at all…. Hahahahahah.

    Seriously, Most people that know my Dad and Me would agree that we have some differences of opinion on things, but I absolutley agree with him on this one.

    Jason-

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  3. Wonderful first blog Bernie, and I look forward to many more! Thanks for explaining separation of Church and State. Many people forget that and it is important. And, even though some of us are not ‘people of faith’, we have faith and hope for a future that is fair and just and kind to all people. Being a proud parent of an amazing child who just happens to be gay, I feel very strongly about same sex marriage. Do I want all of my children to have the same rights? Of course!

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  4. Thanks, Carolyn. Marriage is a really good thing, I think…for all societies and cultures, It provides protections — necessary protections — that people who just “live together” simply don’t have. These days, only the state has the strength and neutrality to provide the protections that all people in committed relationships need.. The church doesn’t…and maybe never should have. The church has a different purpose.

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  5. As ordained church officers who have vowed to receive scripture as “the authoritative word of God,” I believe we ought to uphold “biblical standards” of marriage. Polygymy and concubines are in order. With two marriages down the drain, if I march down the aisle again, I guess I will qualify as a serial polygymist. But, I have yet to work the concubine angle.

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  6. Great, Bernie! I am totally in favor of same-sex marriage and I agree with Carolyn that we need to be fair and kind to all people! Our country has separation of church and state for a reason and too often the church tries to meddle in state matters.

    I love Jason’s sense of humor…what a smart kid!

    Looking forward to more wisdom and common sense from you, cuz

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